I think one solid way of handling the instability is to use high quality light automation (Lutron Caseta, for example) for the things you'll really notice, but for stuff you care less about (for me that's cameras, temperature sensors) you can use cheaper ZWave stuff w/ home assistant. The lights turn on and off when I expect, but temperature might update a little less frequently if HA is flaky.
Honestly, for any sensor that's basically just read only, the best thing I've seen is to just avoid all of the bluetooth/wifi/zigbee/zwave entirely, and just use basic tried and true accurite (or similar) sensors that never need updates and just pull the data with rtl_433. Way, way less fuss, they always just work, batteries last longer, by and large zero bullshit.